It’s been a long winter, cold, wet, windy and one filled with dread. Our Danny & Old Patches were having more and more problems and we knew that we would finally have to have Dr. Randy euthanize them.

I remember the morning Danny was born - it was the 4th of July 1998, he was laying in the grass, and he was the first Cremello I had ever seen. A creamy white foal with blue eyes - I dropped to my knees and put my hand under his tiny chin lifting his little head and whispered - - oh MY BLUE EYED BABY - - and I was forever in Love. His registered name was He’s A Doodle Dandy - but he was Our Danny. He was just the easiest going - sweetest boy and he never changed. When he was 10 months old his right hoof started turning in - and we learned about DOD - Developemental Orthopedic Disease - where the bone grows quickly but the muscle doesn’t keep up, which caused his hoof to turn in putting pressure on his ankle joint. I will just say - that over the years that followed we did everything we could do, to help him with his now crooked leg. Danny grew to be a very big boy - a beautiful white Cremello with haunting soft blue eyes. He was so kind and gentle to everyone - but he loved Tim! He would follow him around - Tim would always stop and bury his head in his neck and give him a hug, Danny would drop his head down over his shoulders almost like he was hugging him back. He did ok for many years - he learned to protect his weak ankle and keep weight off of it when he trotted or ran. But over time it just got worse - and it became harder for him to get around and we knew it was time to set him free.

We began to recognize that Danny & Patches were just growing worse we made the decision to euthanize them together and made arrangements with Dr. Randy. So this morning we set them free from their pain. It was soo easy - they weren’t afraid - there was no pain or struggle. We buried them in the corner of the pasture. It was sad and yet we were releived that they weren’t hurting anymore - and we will carry them in our hearts forever. He was our Danny Boy & she was Ole Patches!

The Day After

The hardest part of having to euthanize Danny & Patches was coming to terms with making the decision, giving up any hope that there wasn’t anything more you could do for them. In your heart you know it’s the right thing to do, that you have to love them enough to let them go - set them free from their pain, before it gets to a crises. I wanted to let them go gently with love. But each day before the appointed day was harder knowing that it was one day closer to when they would be euthanized. Using that word was how you would muffle the sharp reality that they would die. Each time I touched them I tried to absorb deep in my memory how they felt- what they looked like - how beautiful Danny’s pale blue eyes were, giving him a dreamy sweet expression. I brushed Patches beautiful long party colored tail - white, black & grey and felt how silky smooth it was. Doing these things - hurts - makes you sad - - pulls you down - - positive thinking doesn’t help - it’s a sad time. A place in time that you just have to FEEL.

Now it’s the day after. I woke up - they were the first thought of my day - I felt drained - - kind of like being lost in a dream. I went outside to walk to the barn to feed - - the early morning was full of the feel of spring on it’s way - the sun bright and warm and a gentle soft cool breeze seemed to sooth my loss. Life goes on - filled with our precious memories - I wouldn’t have given up one second of having Danny & Patches in my life to avoid the pain of the past few days - - I’m glad that they were put down before it was an emergency situation filled with pain, and fear - - I’m glad that they drifted out of this world gently and for that I feel relief and can let them go and begin to remember all the memories we had with them for all these years and smile.